WEBVTT

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it's a little late for tears
isn't it barbara even

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though you didn't know
it was going to happen today you've

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still had your whole life
to prepare for it of course

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you've gotten into to the habit
of not being prepared.

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And now it's a little late, isn't it?

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You're a creature of habit,
Barbara, we all are.

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Unfortunately,
not all of your habits are good ones.

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This This was how your day started.

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Started wrong.

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Your neighbor, Helen,
is a creature of habit too.

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But she got up when the alarm went off.

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Because, Barbara, that's what she really
had in mind when she said it.

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Helen has trained herself to know
what she's going to do, in what order,

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and where the things are to do it with.

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She really doesn't have to think about it.

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She already knows what clothes
she's going to wear today.

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As it turned out,
it was a special day for Helen, too.

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But she makes a habit
of being ready for special days.

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She starts by having a place
for things and keeping them there.

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She uses taste in selecting her clothes,

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but more than that, she keeps
them clean and mended,

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and she's able to match the right
skirt with the right sweater.

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This was going to be a special day

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for you, but you hadn't gotten very
far with your preparations for it.

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Was your whole family asleep?

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No, your mother was up.
Had been for an hour. Barbara!

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Barbara, get up! You'll be late for school!

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Does she have to do this every morning,
Barbara?

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Barbara, do you hear me?

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If your mother stopped acting like
a second alarm clock for even one day,

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you'd probably think it was a dirty...

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Pete's sake, I hear you! I'm up!
You didn't seem at all appreciative.

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Even if you're not really well -mannered,
you could make a habit of being civil.

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And you weren't really up
when your mother called you.

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Little lies are such a firm
foundation for big ones.

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You started your day with no plan at all.

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Looking for your hairbrush?

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Can't remember where you left it?

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You forgot other important things today.

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You meant to fix that collar,

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but you've gotten into the habit
of putting things off.

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There are so many things you plan
to do this coming Saturday,

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or the one after that.

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Let's see. You found
the algebra notebook you lost.

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The ski pants you meant
to put away in the chest.

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The afghan you started to knit last summer.

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And, oh yes,
the sweater you were looking for.

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you decided to cover
the spots on your sweater

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with a scarf you often
do that but you can't forget

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that the spots are there
if you had a habit plan

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for your mornings you might get
off to a decent start someday.

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Helen has a habit plan
and it includes a healthy breakfast

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and a pleasant word with her parents.

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All three always enjoyed Mr.
Elliot's comments on the news.

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It was time to get started
for office and school.

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Helen's dad would drop
her on the way downtown

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and who could ask for a nicer
way to go to school.

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(music playing)

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Your brother was ready,

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but your father couldn't wait

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for you, or you could have driven
to school with him.

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He used to enjoy that drive too. too.

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Your eggs were cold this morning,

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but you had no time to be picky about food
or to think about your diet.

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No time for milk
or even to say good morning.

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No time for manners.

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You made a pretty picture
with your rumpled skirt,

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your spotted sweater,
and your hair in a tizzy.

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As usual,

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all your neighbors knew how late

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it was when you went
by at your regular dog trot.

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You were late for school this morning,
but then you're almost always late,

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and you're guilty about it, more
so because your lateness is habitual.

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You're in a rut with a bad habit,

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and the longer you stick
with the habit the deeper the rut gets

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when you saw Helen
you suddenly felt envious

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but more than that you felt
a distaste for your sloppy ways

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and you knew
you could do something about them

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if only that wasn't a happy thought

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was it or do you always
drum with your fingers

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you were just chatting away
with Helen when it happened

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when the day suddenly turned into something

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special you've never
been friends with Ann Tolliver

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and you've always wanted to be hi

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some of the crowds coming
over to my house right

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after school do you think you two
could make it Well, that'd be fun, Ann.

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I'd love to. As well. Well,
what do you say, Bobby? Sure, thanks.

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Okay, see you later. Bye.

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That'll be fun,
won't it? Oh, yes. Oh, I see.

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Each school year sees new groups forming,
old ones reforming.

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Yours is a changing social world,

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and the opportunities to be part
of it must be taken when they arise.

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You knew this afternoon
that you were making a bad impression.

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And you knew how easy
it is not to be invited again,

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and how quickly you can be left
out of the crowd.

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You were embarrassed by your messy hair

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and the fingernails
you had neglected to clean.

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You worried about the spots
on your sweater, Barbara.

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But what really showed up were your habits.

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You didn't find it very pleasant
comparing yourself with the others. What?

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I said, what do you think?
You weren't listening. You seldom do.

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It's a habit of yours.

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I guess I don't know much

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about it. They were talking
about a popular book.

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All your friends were interested,

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but you never got
into the habit of reading books.

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The whole problem
was that Claudia wanted to be free

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to do all the things she'd
never been allowed to do.

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Well, that was her whole
reason for leaving her family.

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And then she married back
to the same kind of lying.

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Well, that's why I think the book's
stupid. Why couldn't she have seen?

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No, you added nothing to that conversation.

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The trouble with me is getting started.

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I always have to force myself
to do new things. I'm the same way.

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I didn't even want to go
to my first concert

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because I thought
it would be too long -haired.

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Oh, but the music is wonderful. I'm
going to go to the whole series.

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My mother had to drag me to the museum.

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But they have a wonderful costume exhibit
there. I got an idea for a new dress.

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Oh, what kind? You've never taken
an interest in music or politics or art.

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We, we always go to the beach.
Every year we take a cottage at Esk.

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You've only been once. There's
wonderful swimming and lots of boys.

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It's quiet where we go.

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And there are tennis courts at the hotels,
too, and dances every weekend.

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That sounds grand. And it's
just a short way to the city.

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You couldn't help interrupting, could you?

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And you couldn't help stretching
proof like a rubber band.

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We all like to talk about ourselves,
but a soliloquy isn't a conversation.

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First you didn't talk at all,
and then you did all the talking.

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conversation is a two -way street

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but for you it's either
one way or a dead end

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in all society at all ages we know
that people are going to talk

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about other people unfortunately
our faults are often

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more discussed than our good good points.

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And sometimes our good points
are completely hidden by our faults.

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But perhaps worse of all is our own
disappointment in ourselves

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and the remarks we imagine
our friends are making about us.

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Gee, I think dirty fingernails
are horrible. Maybe she felt shy.

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A spotted sweater isn't shyness.

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And bad manners are still bad
manners no matter what you call

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Now, in your own room,

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the memory of this day stands

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between you and your whole
pattern of behavior.

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Where will you start?

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Your complexion?

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That starts with soap and water

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and goes on to regular meals
and the right kind of food.

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Your hair?

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It's more than just a shampoo

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when you happen to think
of it. Your clothes?

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not just clean when your mother
takes them away from you but a system

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of cleaning for all a pattern a network

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of habits Helen checks
her clothes for cleaning

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when she takes them off that's
a habit of hers this morning

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Helen took her skirt from the front
of the closet tonight she hangs

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it in the back that's
a habit to one on the plus

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side it gives clothes a chance
to to hang rests the fabric.

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Tonight, Helen makes a plan for tomorrow.

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A what to wear,

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what to do, when to do it, designed
for living.

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Helen has the habit of being ready
for special special days.

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Good habits save time and energy

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and give us greater freedom
to do those extra things

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(music playing)

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Yes,

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a good start.

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But these improvements are not yet habits,
not by any means.

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They must happen again and again

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until they fit into the fabric
of the days without conscious thought.

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If you try, really try,
you can root out the poor accidental habits

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and establish in their place
the good habits approved by custom,

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accepted by society.

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Across the street, Helen's light goes out.

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Reasonable hours are part of her pattern.

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And you, Barbara, well,
you've had a hard day.

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But staying awake to think
about it won't help it any.

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Go to bed early for a change.

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Give yourself a good start on a new day.

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(music playing)